The Five Most Dangerous Women
 Hi Brit,
My usually unreliable source sent me another message. This time he/she/it has provided some information that is truely shocking, about the secret lives of these very well know females:
In these troubled times, I thought some little known background information on these operatives would serve to make world events easier to understand.
Hillary Clinton is one of the most effective and productive secret agents the CIA has ever employeed. During her years as First Lady, she used her talent for planting electronic survealance devices to bug hundreds of our friends and enemies while on official visits. She is also a master of hand to hand combat, and can kill quickly and efficiently with almost any small object. The reports of her throwing things at Bill in the White House were actually practice sessions.Â
Nancy Pelosi, besides serving as Speaker of the House is also the best torturer since the Spanish Inquisition. Starting with a part time job as Mistress Nancy, her Domenatrix name, spanking “bad” men at Ming’s House of Pain and Laundromat, she soon realized that torture was her true calling. Being a true patroit, Pelosi offered her services to our intellegince agencies, who are quite pleased with her ability to make even the toughest man beg for the favor of telling every scrap of information he knows. Due to the pressures of her day job, she practices her trade in a secret dungeon, located somewhere under her vinyard.
Queen Elizabeth II, the United Kingdom’s greatest asassan. Using a hatpin coated in slow acting, yet deadly poisoin, she has elliminated over 200 of England’s enimies over the years. You might have noticed that Senator Clinton turned down an oppertunity for a photo shoot with the Queen. This is because Hillary was tipped off that a little Royal revenge might be in the works, as pay back for finding a bug in her crown after having tea with the First Lady a few years back.
Barbra Streisand, is secretly the Chief of Chiefs of all the US crime families. This was passed to her by the original Top Dog in the crime world, Bing Cosby. Both criminal masterminds use coded messages in their music to send out orders which guide all Mob activity in America.Â
Yes, Osama Bin Laden is a woman. The former he underwent sex change surgery in 1993 and adopted the first name of “Alice,” but, still wanting to keep her hand in on the Terrorist front, continues to live as a man most of the time. This, you might note, is the main reason she remains uncaptured.
Well, I must say that does explain a few things.Â
the Grit
mommy zabs says:
May 8th, 2007 at 6:03 pm
so funny
D. Ox says:
May 8th, 2007 at 7:45 pm
Hilarious. I long suspected that Streisand was the Moriarity of international murder and mayhem, cleverly hiding behind the facade of an ignorant, bubble-headed, shrieking, Celib maniac. Man, she’s smooth!
the Grit says:
May 8th, 2007 at 8:04 pm
Hi mz,
First, I replied earlier, but it looks like I either forgot to click on or the software dropped it. Best I can recall I said:
I thank you, and my usually unreliable source thanks you.
Hi DO,
Not all of the Hollywood elite are light in the brain box. Just look at Britney. A few flashes of her naughty bits, a trip to rehab, a shaved head, and she’s gotten more free publicity than anyone except Paris Hilton. And Spears isn’t going to jail for it
Are you going to enter a Top Five post on ProBlogger?
the Grit
Top 5 - Group Writing Project Day 2 says:
May 9th, 2007 at 7:14 am
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Mjuboy says:
May 9th, 2007 at 8:42 am
Haha, hilarious article!!!
Tantowi says:
May 9th, 2007 at 9:34 am
Just wonder, if Osama shave his beard…….
Sharon says:
May 9th, 2007 at 11:10 am
I am suprise you didnt include Condoleeza Rice. She should be number 1 up there
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Ali says:
May 9th, 2007 at 11:25 am
Ha, funny post. Hillary scares me the most though, more than Osama (if he were a woman). But then any woman with a beard would scare me.
Have a look at my Top5 blog post on my blog.
the Grit says:
May 9th, 2007 at 12:27 pm
Hi all,
Thanks for visiting and glad you liked the post. I’m looking forward to reading your top 5s and will get to it as fast as my dial up connection will allow.
Hi Sharon,
If Rice had been on Drudge the day I wrote that, I would have had her on the list. That’s what she gets for going about her job so quietly.
the Grit
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May 9th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
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May 9th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
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Justin Durst Jr says:
May 9th, 2007 at 3:45 pm
Great post, great site. I am a first time visitor and I am loving it. Would you mind trading a link? Your site is great and I will be including it on mine, and emailing this post to several friends. I’d love to be listed here. Thanks! And, great work!
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the Grit says:
May 9th, 2007 at 6:55 pm
Hi Justin,
Most certainly we will give you a link! Most any decent site is worth one, and a few indecent ones as well
In your case, it’s no problem to decide, as, oddly enough for an American, I’m an avid soccer fan. Every now and then, I even call it football, but mostly just to keep the Brit happy.
I’m tickled you liked the post. Make yourself at home. Read all you want, we’ll write more.
the Grit
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Jaganath says:
May 11th, 2007 at 5:35 am
But, isn’t Hillary a man?
the Grit says:
May 11th, 2007 at 11:20 am
Hi J,
You’ve got a good point there. However, for a variety of reasons, that’s one rumor that I really don’t want to investigate
the Grit
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Jack says:
August 3rd, 2007 at 5:06 pm
I knew Osama was a woman. The Speaker of the Houser a dominatrix? I didn’t see that one coming.
the Grit says:
August 3rd, 2007 at 5:44 pm
Hi Jack,
I’m glad people are still finding this post. I had such a good time writing it, that having it lost in the depths of our blog is a shame.
As to Pelosi, she is, after all, from San Francisco
the Grit
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